SONIC: Whoa ... check out these graphics ...

KNUCKLES: And the heart-pounding music ...

TAILS: And the brilliant level design ...

[The screen flashes and they all wince.]

KNUCKLES: That's gotta hurt.

SONIC: I can't believe it! I lost! I LOST! [He bangs his fists on the gamepad, kicks the couch and generally carries on.]

TAILS: Can I play now?

SONIC: Nope. [He sits down and starts a new game.]

[Amy walks in with an ice cream stain on her shirt. She looks sourly at the TV screen.]

AMY: What are you playing now?

SONIC: [eyes locked on the screen] Shhh!

[Amy looks at the screen in disbelief]

AMY: You're playing Pong again?

[Indeed, it's the original Pong, with two colors. Sonic, Tails and Knuckles all hiss, "Shhh!" Amy walks to the TV and unplugs it.]

SONIC: HEY!!!

AMY: Movietime.

5...3...4...2...1...

[They enter the theater]

SONIC: [Snarling] I can't believe this! My high score! I was this close to winning! THIS CLOSE!

TAILS: Oh good. You riff stuff better when you're mad.

"Hey!"

SONIC: You unplugged Pong!!

      "AAAAAAAAH!!!" Dash screamed.

KNUCKLES: He had found a pickle in his hamburger.

      "Oops, I forgot to tell you.

TAILS: That thing you're standing on is a landmine.

Espio followed me here." Sonic explained.

      Thanks to the combination of the shadows

SONIC: There were multiple black hedgehogs in the cave, leering unpleasently at the intruders.

and his camouflage, Espio had been practically invisible as he followed them
      into the Emerald Chamber.

TAILS: Toting a railgun, intending to pick off as many of the self-inserts as he could.

"No-one has told me what's going on."

KNUCKLES: Me neither.

      Myron told his story,

SONIC: [as Myron] Once upon a time there was a boy named Sam who took a book off a shelf and read a little and put it back. The end.

and Dash explained about how cutting the Master Emerald would mean the destruction of Chaos
      and the Floating Island.

KNUCKLES: [sniff] I still think it's the worst thing I've ever heard. Now everybody will die.

SONIC: And it's all Dash's fault! Yeah!

      Knuckles was understandably upset.

[Knuckles cries] I never got a chance to play Pong!

"If we don't do it, Chaos will destroy the Great Forest, and then probably
      everything else."

TAILS: Total wanton destruction!

SONIC: If you like the six o'clock news, then you'll love Nature Trail to He--

KNUCKLES: For heaven's sake, don't sing that! It's too dang catchy!

      Espio seemed surprised. "Oh!

TAILS: [as Espio] But I thought you liked that song.

There was no way for you to know this, but Chaos isn't in the Great Forest any more!
      It's surrounding Robotropolis."

SONIC: Robotropolis is in perfect chaos.

[Tails and Knuckles glare at him.]

SONIC: I couldn't resist the pun, sorry.

      "Are you sure?" asked Knuckles.

TAILS: After all, it might have been a water main that busted.

      "Let me check."

KNUCKLES: Yup, definately Chaos. People are running around screaming their lungs out.

SONIC: Which is pretty amazing when you're under water.

      "Yes, Chaos is still near Robotropolis. It seems to be pacing around the perimeter.

TAILS: Slop, slop slop. And everyone thought it was just those kids having another water fight.

It has gone inside a few times, but it
      left shortly afterward each time. Apparently it didn't find anything of interest."

SONIC: Apparently this monster ain't attracted to toxic waste like most of them.

Rotor answered in the communicator.
      "We're trying to remain unseen.

KNUCKLES: [as Rotor] Which is pretty difficult, until I go on a diet.

TAILS: When he sits around the house, he really sits AROUND the HOUSE! Hoo hoo hoo!!

We don't want anything to lure it or drive it away from Robotropolis."

SONIC: Better Robotnik than us.

      "Oh no." Mighty said.

TAILS: [As Mighty] I forgot to brush my hair this morning! Wait, I don't have any.

      2 turkeys with energy weapons seemed to be sneaking up on Chaos.

KNUCKLES: What do those turkeys think they're doing?

SONIC: Maybe they want to gobble gobble some water monster.

TAILS: A cityline after Chaos is through with it.

"We don't have an electricity inspector around here," said Robotnik suspiciously.

SONIC: Oh no ... it's Pip again! And she's still wearing that hat! [Guffaws]

      "That's all you know.

KNUCKLES: [as Pip] I could be in a completely different costume by this act.

I don't think that that's important right now, though. I mean a monster is going to inflict slightly
      more damage than an inspector, don't you think?"

SONIC: Of course, she held the nuclear explosives behind her back, where Robotnik wouldn't see them ..

      Before anyone could reply, her com-link buzzed. She clicked it on.
      "Err... look this isn't the best time to call, y'know.

TAILS: Don't you hate it when your phone rings in the middle of a life-or-death meeting with an Evil Overlord?

What? Oh, so you believe me now, do you? I was not joking, I did
      get here by magic! Listen, this monster's outside and won't let me leave. Don't ask me why, maybe he doesn't like bats
      or something. Anyway, I'm stuck in Robotropolis for now. Could you send Sonic over or something? He's gone on a
      mission? Where to? That's a little dangerous, isn't it? Oh, that's okay, he's got Slasher with him. Thanks, but I’ve gotta
      go now."

KNUCKLES: [as Robotnik] Wrong number, huh?

      "Send Sonic over or something?" said Robotnik, glowering. "Metal Sonic, get her!"

SONIC: For some reason, that cracks me up. "Send Sonic over," like calling for a superhero is like ordering pizza.

TAILS: Hello, I would like to order one large superhero, with cape, spandex suit, mask, and oh, maybe a few super powers, if you can manage it.

      Pip had already shot out of the room.

TAILS: They had a giant gun all set for ejecting robotizer rejects from the room.

SONIC: Who would ever be a robotizer reject?

KNUCKLES: The folks who escape, of course.

They raced down the corridors, pounding their feet on the metal surface.

SONIC: Metal Sonic began to pull ahead, but Pip caught up and beat him to the finish.

Just as
      Metal Sonic was about to catch her, however, she started to

TAILS: Morph into a Power Ranger.

vanish... Determined not to go back to Robotnik empty
      handed, he grabbed hold of her and they were both teleported away.
     In Robotnik's main control room, Vlad vanished, too...

KNUCKLES: What a shame. He was just about to make a major breakthrough in his research into Strawberry Kool-aid.

TAILS: It's the smallest chat window in existance.

"HEY!" came a scream.

SONIC: You put chocolate syrup on my ice cream! I WANTED CARMEL!!

The liquid monster stopped pacing around, and turned it's 'head'. (Or at least what looked like
      a head.)

KNUCKLES: That was it's shoulder.

SONIC: Notice the loads of fangs. This beast can only be hurt with bladed weapons.

Basil the Scrub Turkey stood there,

TAILS: With a bar of soap and a scrub brush.

SONIC: [as Basil's mother] Get to work, young man!

grinning. "NYAUGH NYAUGH! CAN'T CATCH ME!" he shouted.

TAILS: I AM ACTUALLY A HOLOGRAM BEAMED DOWN FROM THE ENTERPRISE! YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME, HAHAHAHAAA!!

      The monster known as 'Chaos' growled...

KNUCKLES: "I hate those things, although the holodeck in Insurrection was cool."

      "Breathe in... breathe out... dark halo ahead... breathe in...

TAILS: Inhale dark halo ...

SONIC: Spit dark halo at other dark halos ...

KNUCKLES: Turn into a pink marshmallow ...

dark blotch in the light... breathe out... must restore light...
      breathe in... must destroy the darkness...

SONIC: It must be depressing to be Chaos.

KNUCKLES: [as Chaos] Doctor, I have a problem. I only see living things as dark splotches in reality. What should I do?

TAILS: [as the doctor] My son, you have a strange ailment. You must join the Environmental movement and destroy the fools who would build power plants in California.

KNUCKLES: [as Chaos] Must ... destroy ... power plants ...

breathe out... sound... what was it? 'Get 'im Floyd'? Do not understand...

SONIC: [as Chaos] They must be the fools building power plants!

      breathe in... sound... what was it? Gunfire... breathe out... pain... electric shock...

TAILS: There went the nuclear reactor.

another blotch... behind me... has an
      energy weapon...

SONIC: [as Chaos] Must ... level up ...

breathe in... ROAR!... blotches are frightened... fear... breathe out... intimidated... suggested
      response -

TAILS: Suggested response: sizzle their innards with the worst cussing ever heard on Mobius.

hostile attack... gasp in... breathe out... attack."

KNUCKLES: "We're under attack!" shouted Floyd as a giant tack squashed him flat.

      "WE GOT A LIVE ONE, FLOYD!" shouted Basil, as Chaos

TAILS: Leaped out of the water, flashing his silvery sides. Then he dove back into the water. Basil leaned back in the fighting chair, reeling for all he was worth as fishing line whined off the spool ...

SONIC: Then they gaffed Chaos and held him up. "Keeper size!"

roared and attacked. It formed itself into a river, and
      chased them. As they ran, Basil moved up to Floyd.

KNUCKLES: Then tripped him and threw him back for Chaos to eat.

SONIC: It was Thanksgiving, after all.

"What's the plan again?" he asked. Floyd grinned. "There's a cave
      over there, a few of K's ahead... near Kope City.

TAILS: THAY DIED! WAT A GRATE FIC!!

I think it's an archaeological dig site, or something....

SONIC: It could be a giant rock band's stage, but I could be wrong.

we get into our
      jeep, go there, trick the beastie into going into the cave, and then we cause an avalanche... BOOM! Instant canned
      monster!

KNUCKLES: The kind that pop out of the can and surprise your friends.

And we get FILTHY RICH!"

TAILS: Yeah, they patent it and all the spinoffs. Here Sonic, look what I found in my pocket.

SONIC: What is it?

TAILS: Read the package. Rattlesnake eggs.

SONIC: L-looks, uh, interesting. Have you kept it in a cool, dry place like it says to?

TAILS: Oops, no, I haven't. It's been in my pocket all afternoon. Maybe you should look inside and see if they've hatched.

[Sonic takes the envelope and opens the flap very carefully. As soon as he peers inside, there is a loud rattling sound. Sonic throws the envelope across the theater, spines standing on end, while Knuckles and Tails fall all over, laughing.]

SONIC: Laugh it up, fuzzball.

      The Governess sat on her chair, tapping her fingers. Beside her was Sonic, tied into a very torturous position.

TAILS: His arms were wrapped around his back three times, his ankles were tied around his neck, and he was lying on his face.

SONIC: [gasping] I ... won't play ... Twister again!

After
      knocking him out, amazingly, the Chaos beast had returned to the emerald, which was now under glass in the
      Governess' chambers.

KNUCKLES: In a tiny test tube.

TAILS: [Chaos in falsetto] Lemme out! Lemme out! Help me! Helllllpp meeeee!

Suddenly, she saw the flash of light that she was waiting for.

SONIC: The strobe lights announcing the start of the live concert in her honor.

TAILS: Tonight it's DC Talk, performing Time Is!

[Tails, Knuckles and Sonic interrupting each other] "It's too short of a time." "I have lots of time." "They say time waits for no man." "All the time." "Wait a minute." "It'll just take a little time." "Time out!"

TOBY, MIKE AND KEVIN: Time is tickin' away, tick tick tickin' away! Time is tickin away, tick tock tickity tock, tick tick tickity tock!

Tash appeared, clearing his throat.

KNUCKLES: There was a frog in it.

SONIC: That was the last time he ate at a fancy restaurant before going to work.

      "Well.. what are they doing?" asked the Governess.

TAILS: [as Tash] Performing. Duh.

TOBY, MIKE AND KEVIN: All the money ... in the world ... can never stop the hands of time ..

"Your honor... I have been spying on your bounty hunters for
      some time now, and I'm afraid

SONIC: They like DC Talk so much they blew all their cash on albums.

I have some bad news. None of them appear to be working on their task any more.

KNUCKLES: They're all listening to the concert.

TOBY, MIKE AND KEVIN: And a wasted ... day in your life ... is more than a crime ... now kick it! Time is tickin' away ...

      Myron is actually on an expedition.. an ADVENTURE..

[All] OH HORRORS!!

with the very hedgehog that he is supposed to be capturing.

SONIC: I actually saw them swapping Pokemon cards.

TAILS: Really? I'm still missing Sebulbasaur and Pikachubacca.

      Floyd and Basil have actually CHANGED EMPLOYERS, and have completely forgotten about the task at hand.

KNUCKLES: What were they hired to do, anyway?

SONIC: [scratching head] I don't remember. That was too many riffs ago. Was it to bring back Myron or me?

TAILS: Maybe both.

      Thorn is nowhere to be found... she may be still on the task, but I doubt she will be sufficient to--" "ENOUGH!"
      shouted the Governess, through her teeth.

SONIC: I tried that once and broke my teeth.

TAILS: I thought those were real.

KNUCKLES: They're caps. Six hundred bucks a tooth.

She let out a long sigh. "A wise woman prepares

SONIC: Stupidly.

wisely... the only way to
      get something right is to

TAILS: Have somebody else do it who knows how to do it right.

do it YOURSELF, and not leave the job to

KNUCKLES: Smart people.

IDIOTS!" She reached into a drawer, and pulled
      out a

TAILS: Bazooka.

SONIC: Grenade.

KNUCKLES: Pink elephant.

black hat, with a very dark veil. Only her mouth could be seen clearly.

SONIC: Complete with it's dripping fangs.

She turned to face Tash. "Drain the city."

TAILS: I'm filling my Olympic-sized pool today.

      she commanded. "Uh.. excuse me, ma'am?" replied Tash.

SONIC: I'm feeling drained today.

"DRAIN IT!" shouted the Governess. "Drain EVERY LAST
      DROP

KNUCKLES: Of sewage.

TAILS: Of methane gas.

SONIC: Of rockin' tunes.

of energy out of this city.. I want EVERY WATT

TAILS: Every what?

SONIC: Every watt.

TAILS: Yeah, what?

SONIC: Watt, that's what.

TAILS: I just said that. What?

SONIC: Watt.

TAILS: I have the strangest feeling I'm in a Who's on Third routine.

pumped into TimeWarp sector.. and set it to transport
      fifty-one to the designated time..."

KNUCKLES: Fifty one what?

SONIC: Watt?

KNUCKLES: Don't you start ...

"FIFTY-ONE?" shouted Tash, not believing it.

TAILS: That will take every last gallon of ice cream we have!

"The generators would be working at
      their utmost capacity.. if not over!

SONIC: Boom.

TAILS: THAY DIED! WAT A GRATE FIC!!

And I do not recommend doing this to your people--" "DO IT!" screamed the
      Governess.

KNUCKLES: Just do it.

SONIC: Watt?

TAILS: I may be fat, but you're ugly, and I can lose weight.

SONIC: My ego is crippled for life.

"You are NOT here to

KNUCKLES: Relax!

TAILS: [In a Mexican accent] Hey man, this is torture. Chain me to the wall.

recommend! You are here to

SONIC: Slave away while chained to the wall.

KNUCKLES: At least you cut out the watt jokes.

SONIC: Watt?

WORK! Now, GO! I want the portal set to transport
      ME and FIFTY IMPERIAL SOLDIERS! THAT HEDGEHOG IS MINE!!!! SONIC, PREPARE TO RECEIVE
      YOUR MEDICINE!!!"

TAILS: WITHOUT THE SUGAR! BWAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!

Tash rushedly left the building,

SONIC: Ladies and gentlemen, Tash has rushedly left the building!

TAILS: Rapidly?

KNUCKLES: Hurriedly?

followed by the Governess. At the mention of his name, Sonic
      propped up his head.

TAILS: With a pair of sticks.

KNUCKLES: After all, his head was just lying there, and he couldn't see very well.

He remembered this adventure.. it was about forty years ago.

SONIC: And Sonic picked up the Sports Almanac, hid it in his coat and smuggled it into the DeLorean.

Obviously, if he was there now, he
      must have survived the adventure the first time...

TAILS: Obviously. Unless, of course, he was undead or something.

SONIC: Oooo, ahhh, I am a Zombie Hedgehog! I will make you play my games forever and ever!

but ever since the invention of time travel,

KNUCKLES: People had distorted the space-time continuum so badly that time now extended infinately in all directions.

SONIC: Oh no! Space-time Four has become Space-time Six!

TAILS: Oh, right, and how many people do you know have actually played the Dig?

SONIC: Umm ... hardcore Lucasarts fans?

it had been discovered that
      history COULD in fact be

SONIC: Twisted.

TAILS: Diluted.

KNUCKLES: Made into an endless number of inane Disney cartoons.

[All scream]

changed. For this reason, it was banned from use, except from the highest authority.

KNUCKLES: The Journeyman Project.

SONIC: Four.

TAILS: [as Arthur] Tra-la-la-la-la! I can't hear you! I'm not listening!

The old
      hedgehog coughed. "Please win, Sonic.." he mumbled. "Your adventure ends in that cave... please make it a victory..."

TAILS: Aww. It's kinda sad seeing Sonic get old.

SONIC: Hey, I thought they said I was in excellent condition!!

SONIC: Sorry, that was me. They had a sale on chilidogs across town.

The TimeWarp sector was a long, dark bunker, with its only light source being the shining sea-blue ripple of the
      TimeGate, in the room's end.

TAILS: Uh oh. Time for the Stargate spoof.

Numerous wires and cables were hanging from walls and the ceiling,

KNUCKLES: It grows much faster than bamboo. Take care or it'll come after you.

some being laid into
      mixed patterns on the ground to connect the machines.

SONIC: Celtic weave.

Some were broken or wore off, and sparkling with electricity.

[All] Oooo! Ahhh! Pretty lights!

      And Tash, standing behind the controls console, hadn't been

SONIC: So homesick for his straitjacket in weeks.

this worried about the Gate for ten years. Not only the
      power needed to transfer the Governess' forces to past, and which would plug off the whole underground Dust Hill
      complex;

KNUCKLES: Did you understand that, Sonic?

SONIC: Not a word.

TAILS: Maybe he's from Empyrion, where the language has shifted.

but the shock all the energy would make in the Gate's regulators. It never had to absorb as much as energy
      as needed to

SONIC: Explode.

TAILS: Generate a life crystal.

KNUCKLES: Create one point twenty-one gigawatts.

SONIC: [As Doc] One point twenty-one gigiwatts!

warp 51 persons. And Tash had been ordered to keep the Gate so, until the Governess would had
      completed her mission. Insane.

TAILS: Anybody who gives Sonic his medicine without a spoonful of sugar is insane.

SONIC: Hello. My name is Sonic, and I'm a sugar addict.

[All] Hi, Sonic.

      Governess' Autonoids, robotic jet-pack troopers were arranged into a square formation behind her.

KNUCKLES: They were square dancing.

SONIC: A dance invented by the Borg.

The dictator
      herself was on the lead, fully dressed in her combat armor.

TAILS: Look, it's Seven of Nine.

She was looking ferociously into the bluish void in front of
      her eyes.

SONIC: If she was looking into it, where else could it be?

It was now the only obstacle blocking her way to her nemesis - and it was about to be removed, whether it
      would cost her people's welfare or not.

KNUCKLES: Oh well, they all said. It's just another rolling blackout.

That was an aspect the Governess' had passed often, and so it never would be
      hard to her. Never.

TAILS: Um, what?

SONIC: I wonder if Amy would let us out early.

      "Tash, power the Gate!" She spoke victoriously.

KNUCKLES: Igor, throw the switch!

The fox behind his console was sweating.

SONIC: In all the excitement, he had forgotten to water the horse!

The blackout - and
      propably,

TAILS: What's 'propably'?

SONIC: Something the spellchecker missed.

KNUCKLES: Oh boy! Now we get to riff misspellings, too!

the destruction of the Dust Hill city was now available for him; in a form of one switch. If he'd go with orders,
      and push it...but if he'd not...

SONIC: The whole universe explodes!

TAILS: Tune in next week for the exciting conclusion!

KNUCKLES: [humming the Voyager theme]

      "Tash! Power the Gate now!" Governess raged.

KNUCKLES: Igor, I told you to throw the switch. Didn't you hear me?

SONIC: [as Igor] But sir, I was only listening to the band!

TOBY, MIKE AND KEVIN: Time is tickin' away!

TAILS: Oh come on, that song's over by now!

EARTHSUIT: One time, one time!

[Sonic attacks the stage with an axe]

[Jars of Clay comes on, plays Goodbye, Goodnight, and leaves.]

      Tash closed his eyes. "God forgive me." And, pressed his hand slowly on the lever.

KNUCKLES: The universe exploded.

TAILS: THAY DIED! WAT A GRATE FIC!!

The wires sparkled, and a distant,
      low hum cut from somewhere up. "...The regulators have stopped emitting power from the SLR turbines to elsewhere
      Dust Hill than the TimeWarp sector."

SONIC: Doesn't that mean that the power was turned AWAY from the TimeGate?

KNUCKLES: Pay attention, Tails, to grammar school: this is what you must never do.

Tash took a deep breath. "Connecting all input to the TimeGate..." As Tash gave
      commands with the console, the void in the Gate brightened; the air before it rippled, causing variations in the image
      what Tash and Governess saw of the full-powered Gate.

TAILS: The Governess saw a roast chicken. Tash, on the other hand, saw only a beautiful Romulan Warbird.

SONIC: [as Luke Skywalker] It's a piece of junk!

KNUCKLES: [as Han] Twenty-eight point four, past lightspeed. She made the Kessel Run in less than twelve parsecs, you know.

SONIC: I made it in eight. So there.

      "Searching time frame......done." Tash dialed a setting with the numerical pad.

TAILS: The Governess didn't know it, but he hit Num Lock and played a game on an emulator while she wasn't looking.

He stopped with the final digit for a while
      - and, finally, let out a nervous sigh and pressed it.

SONIC: D-E-S-T-R-U-C-T.

KNUCKLES: And the universe exploded.

TAILS: THAY DIED! WAT A GRATE FIC!!

"Governess, you will end up on near the border of the Great Forest,

KNUCKLES: [as Tash] And I foresee you will meet a tall, dark stranger. He is handsome. His name might even be Robotnik.

      two miles far from Kope City." Tash reported. The Governess flashed an evil smile at him.

SONIC: She was all out of pleasent smiles and sinister smiles.

"Good. Troopers, follow
      me!" And she walked into the Gate's light, vanishing; as the jet-pack troopers followed her, marching in their formation.

TAILS: The Borg square-dance.

SONIC: Like that cheat in Rebel Assault 2 where you get to see the Stormtroopers dancing in the background while two officers talk.

      Tash watched, as the last one of the robots walked through the gate.
      "I may not have done the right thing....but at least, I tried." He said to himself.

KNUCKLES: [as Yoda] Do not try. There is no trying.

SONIC: If at first you don't fricassee, fry fry a hen.

      "No, T-man...ya did as your heart said....that's a right thing, if what."

SONIC: Oh no. No! Not him! Not ...

Said a voice behind Tash. It was Jarod;

SONIC: AHHHHHHHHH!!! IT'S THE DUDE WITH SPAGHETTI HAIR!!

[Knuckles and Tails singing] On top of Spa-geeeh-teeee, all covered with cheeeeese, I lost my poor meeeeet baaaaall, 'cause somebody sneeeezed!!

as you
      could say from his speech style. The echidna was uncaptured.

TAILS: Jarod's pokeball bounced off Tash's head.

KNUCKLES: Wait! First it said Tash was a fox, and now he's an echidna!

SONIC: Another case of spontanious evolution.

      "Jarod...where did you hear that from?" He asked humorously.

SONIC: The funny farm, where life is beautiful all the time, and I'll be happy to see those nice young men in their clean white coats, because ...

[Knuckles clamps his hand over Sonic's mouth]

TAILS: ... THEY'RE COMING TO TAKE ME AWAY, HA HA!!

      "From my bro." The echidna said.
      "Staros?"

KNUCKLES: Surly?

TAILS: Ornery?

SONIC: Rude?

KNUCKLES: Four more and you've got the seven dwarves.

      "No." Jarod said. "Myron."

SONIC: That explains why Myron is a grouch all the time.

      "Oh. Never heard him saying things like that." Tash said, looking into the portal.

KNUCKLES: Mostly he just says things like, "Grunt, oo, ugh, boogabooga."

      "Myron...he's way different what he look likes.

TAILS: He's really a snake that looks like an echidna. Hey, are there any Mobian snakes?

SONIC: Not that I know of. Who would want a character without arms or legs?

TAILS: Earthworm Jim has them somehow ...

KNUCKLES: Evil Overlord rule: I will not turn into a snake. It never helps.

SONIC: Yeah, the hero just might turn into a mongoose.

TAILS: Or a CaraCara.

He just...can't always bring his good side up, you know, T-man."

SONIC: He never lets anybody see his soft white underbelly.
 

      Mobius, another place, different time.

KNUCKLES: One upon a time there was a peaceful planet called Mobius. The one day ...

      A bright spot formed in the mid-air.

KNUCKLES: Out of it came hoardes of evil robots! They destroyed the planet and killed everybody, then went home. The end.

TAILS: THAY DIED! WAT A GRATE FIC!!

It gained growth, until got a circular shape.

SONIC: Pay attention in grammar school. This is what you must never do.

The Governess stepped out of the
      bluish portal, and was soon followed by a strikeforce of mechanical Autonoids, with jet-packs built in their backs.

KNUCKLES: I do believe he told us that already.

SONIC: Those jetpacks must be very important.

The
      Governess was holding her gun tightly, looking around in all directions, but in few seconds, she noticed something
      fiercely wrong in the scenery.

TAILS: It was totally leveled under the after-effects of a hydrogen bomb.

As the warp-blindness would have finished, he had waited to see the lush, green woods
      of the Great Forest. Instead, what he saw was a burnt, hostile environment,

TAILS: See?

SONIC: You're psychic.

with a dark orange sky and rocky ground,
      with basaltic volcanoes erupting in somewhere the distance.

KNUCKLES: You forgot the air. It was mostly ammonia and nitrogen. She suffocated on the spot.

TAILS: SHE DIED! WAT A GRATE FIC!!

Something was indeed wrong. And the only life form what
      was spotted by an Autonoid scanner was a small fish-like creature in a dirty water pond. The fish swam close to the
      open land, and suddenly jumped out of the water. Clumsily it started to crawl on land, trying to push itself towards
      with its fins.

SONIC: Gag me with a chainsaw. They went too far back in time.

TAILS: Do people really believe that they crawled out of the primordial soup as a nasty fish larva?

KNUCKLES: Sadly enough, they do, Tails.

SONIC: You know, if they really managed to travel back a million years, Earth wouldn't exist.

The Governess was stunned; but when the took a look at the fish, something in her brains clicked.
      "Trooper, in what time we are now?"
      "Sorry ma'am, but the sensors don't recognize the time frame. It must be so early or late that it isn't stored in our
      databanks."
      Governess looked again at the fish.

TAILS: Houston, we have a problem.

      "TAAAAAAASSHH!!!!!"

KNUCKLES: Or you could just scream your tech's name.

SONIC: It's all his fault, anyway. He was playing Vectorman on the numpad.

TAILS: That has better graphics than Pong.

SONIC: Too bad. That means I get your turn.

TAILS: NOOO!!

[Tails runs out of the theater, Sonic chasing him. Knuckles follows them out.]

[Commercials.]